Strange sensation a.k.a babies first kicks

Another big moment of pregnancy is the first time a woman can actually feel the baby moving. They have been moving for a while but theres a special moment when it finally becomes pronounced enough to feel. I hadn't realized that it felt so different for every woman. I heard sooo many different descriptions.
~it feels like a gas bubble
~sort of like a hunger growl
~it feels like a flutter
~I felt a little poke
~it tickled me at first
~was the same sensation as butterflies
etc.. you get the idea.
All helpful ways of describing it but I was feeling none of these things and it was a little disappointing. Especially since my lil gummy bear is quite active! During the ultrasounds it looks like shes having dance parties in my uterus. She squirms, kicks, plays with her hands.. very active. My husband and I joked that she was training to be the next American Ninja Warrior.

So why all this movement but not feeling a thing? beats me. All I know is one night (opening night of an improv show) sitting back stage I got my first little flutter/poke/bubble.. whatever you want to call it. Apparently she was wishing mommy good luck! instead of saying break a leg she just kicked me. It was a wonderful and strange moment lol. After that it became more and more obvious that she is moving around in there, without the help of an ultrasound tech. My husband can even feel her move and kick now too. Its harder for him though because she usually stops when he puts his hand there. I think its because she is comforted by him and has no reason to squirm.

As far as movement I just hope she slows down when I am nearing the end and it starts getting painful. But until that time she can dance and kick all she wants. Lately I am relating pregnancy to a plane ride. The ride itself can be tedious. The seat is uncomfortable and the airline food is gross and may make you sick to your stomach but the destination is worth the wait. My lil gummy is my luggage. Along the ride I know its in the cargo hold but don't see it until I reach the destination. Her kicks are a reminder of just how precious my cargo is.

think i'll close this post with another ultrasound pic. After all it is a pregnancy blog. enjoy!

Boy parts or Girl parts?

Anatomy Ultrasound. Thats what they called the appointment where my husband and I found out the gender of our lil one. Like alot of first time moms I was sooo anxious and excited! I impatiently counted down the days. Most of my immediate family were guessing girl but a few people guessed boy too. I refused to guess at all! no point in assuming until its perfectly clear, right?Sure why not!

The time had come and I lay there with that weird goo on my belly. The tech had to search all over. I should add that my baby moves around alot! The dance parties in my belly make it hard to measure routine things they look at. Stuff like organ function, heartbeat, fingers and toes.. size of babies head.  Also the entire time the tech was doing that I was just trying to find the genitals lol. The suspense was killing me and it didnt help that the tech was looking for everything BUT what i was looking for. Just as I was thinking it was too early to tell, the ultrasound tech said "looks like your having a little girl".

"WHAT? where?? how can you tell? Oh RIGHT! cuz theres no wang and balls!!! DUH!" thats exactly what I thought. Good thing I didn't say that out loud. It was then that I realized I did see it on the screen. The "it" for a girl is simply the lack of it.. if that makes any sense at all. The ultrasound tech gave us a picture but I felt protective over my little girls parts so I wont be sharing that one. There are already too many pictures of vaginas on the internet to look at!!

So after the "finding" the nervousness set in. I said I didn't care about the gender as long as it was healthy and this is true. But at the same time I worry because I am not that feminine. The only dainty quality that I possess is probably my height. I dont like the color pink and was a tom boy. What am I going to do if my little girl wants to do.... *gasp*.. little girl things?? Oh I was also an incredible pain in the butt as a teenager. What will that part be like?? More new questions and with no answers in site! but theres hope. If mommy fails teach her how to be a lady at least she'll have plenty of aunts to ask. LOL

Bloodshot is the new Glowing!.. Morning sickness

Now that I have posted about the beginning discovery and excitement of my little miracle I wanted to do a post about how that miracle has been treating me through the 1st Trimester. More specifically how things have been in the morning sickness department. I think it differs for every woman and every pregnancy and its important to discuss it because you never know who might relate. Oh and btw I have no tips for beating morning sickness. When I find things that work, other than time, I will share them. Sry!

So I mentioned that I found out at 5weeks. One of the first things I thought of was "I feel absolutely fine! maybe I wont get bad morning sickness." HAHAHA was I wrong. Just before hitting 6 weeks I started noticing a few things.
The first thing was that I had somehow let most of the food in the fridge go bad. I threw out alot of stuff because it smelled wrong.
My hand soap and toothpaste smelled way too strong. How had I not realized they stunk this bad before?
My kitchen sink garbage disposal Must have been broken because that too smelled aweful.
News flash!! This is called pregnancy nose. lol once I recognized it I stopped checking expiration labels.
The dreaded morning sickness kicked in right after I got my super sense of smell. I should've foresaw what was coming.
(Warning. this may get gross)
At first it was just mild nausea. That was pretty much at the 6wk mark. After that the nausea got worse and then I began gagging but never throwing up. I spent entire days running back and forth to the bathroom with no gratification. Even if I was in public, it would come on and I would feel the need to run to a bathroom. In my opinion, this was worse. I kept thinking that if I just vomited I would feel better. If I got nauseated while eating I would spit up whatever food was in my mouth and have to throw the rest of my meal away only to be stricken with hunger pains shortly after.

Finally I got my wish and began actually vomiting. Not always food though. Apparently if you have no gallbladder you're more proned to vomit up bile. Bile tastes like stomach acid. Basically I would heave and heave and HEAVE and yellow colored FIRE would come up. I know that may sound weird but eventually it did turn to food. So my new stomach would make me gag and nauseous all day/every day and I would puke every other day.
One day I heaved so hard that I popped blood vessels all over my face and one eye. The face healed quickly but I had a bloodshot eye for a few weeks. It looked demonic. So much for glowing pregnancy. More like red freckle faced with the terminator eye.
Thankfully this has gotten better. I still puke but not nearly as much. I still get the red freckles from broken blood vessels but only on my cheeks. I really hope that terminator eye was a one time appearance or atleast waits till Halloween nxt time.

that red dot eventually took over the entire sclera. (white part of my eyeball)

TTC no more!

My husband and I have been trying for a baby for over a year. This actually isn't a long time for women who are TTC (trying to concieve), but given my pessimistic nature I was getting discouraged. I was Ms Negative up until April. Thats when the unthinkable happened.

the middle test was the first one i took. see how faint the line is? thats why i took 2 more lol

We'd probably gone through 4 tests, all with a negative result, so by April I had unofficially postponed things. It was stressing me out and I thought maybe a break from "trying" would help. Turns out I didn't need a break. I was 2 days late when I took the test. I dont even really know why I took it. 2 days late isnt exactly the red flag, but I did and guess what? lol it was positive! Just to be sure I took 2 more tests and yup, same thing! Now I had to tell the hubby.

I decided a txt was impersonal and he doesn't have the kind of job where I can just call him. It would have to be an emergency. Instead I waited till he got home and practiced what to say. Funny thing about practicing conversations for me, they never go as planned. The car drove up and I just froze. I was speechless when he came into the house so I took him by the hand and led him to the counter where I'd placed the tests. I figured they'd do the talking for me. He was ecstatic!

After my Dr appointment to confirm it we told the parents. For the record I wanted to wait much longer, in case something went wrong, to tell the rest of my family. I visualized phone chats where I would break the news and get to hear the excitement in their voices. NOT how it worked out. After the first ultrasound picture my husband decided the cat had to be let out of the bag via fb post. I was mortified that my close family found out on the internet but I don't think they were too angry, thank goodness!

@5wks. For some reason it reminded me of a gummy bear so that became the nickname. "my lil gummy bear"

 So theres the beginning! I'll make another post later about how the pregnancy has been treating me so far. Warning, it may be a long one.